Happy Birthday Mom.

(She was my mother-in-law, but to me she was still just mom).

Sorry this is such a long story, but I'm very unsettled with it all still.

I'll start with Martin...

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Martin was only 49 years old. He was a loving father, son, brother, uncle... last year he was diagnosed with lymphoma. I didn’t know him too well, but knew him enough to know he loved his family and he was a kind person. Always smiling and cracking jokes. I’ll never forgotten the time he said to me, “Oh wow, I didn’t realize you spoke, let alone had a sense of humour!!”. .. (Because I usually just sat back and listened, but that day I was laughing and ripping on him over something).

Martin passed away the evening of February 24th, 2012. His memories will not be forgotten.

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Sylvia was only 51 years old. She was a loving mother, grandmother, daughter, sister, aunt... last fall she was diagnosed with colorectal cancer. After countless visits with her doctor and months of feeling something was wrong, the doctor kept sending her home insisting that nothing was wrong and the symptoms she was experiencing was menopause. Unfortunately, she never spoke of her health concerns to anybody and rather than getting a second opinon, she took her doctors word in trust. In the meantime, a tumour was growing at an alarming rate. By the time they discovered it, it was too late to be removed and had spread to her liver, lungs and bones. They refered to her cancer as “very aggressive and fast growing”; there was nothing they could do to save her, only give her high doses of radiation (to attempt to shrink the tumour and ease her pain) followed by high doses of chemotherapy, only to prolong what was left of her short cut life.

It was such a shock to find out how ill she was because she kept on top of her health, didn’t smoke, didn’t drink, always eating healthy meals, excercising on a regular basis, making sure to go to her regular check-ups and screenings... Knowing that one simple test scould have saved her life is heartbreaking. And had she felt her life was in such danger, we all know she would have done something about it.

She had just reached the top of her 20 year career and things were going great in her life. She spent any spare moment that she could visiting with her family, especially her grandchildren.

Her and her husband were going on 30 years of marriage; they were avid with their “dating” and very much in love still... Even after 30 long years, every Friday night, he always took her on their romantic dinner dates.

She went from a wonderfully picture perfect life to becoming immobile and bedridden almost overnight. She had to quit her job and visit her family from the side of a bed, but she never once complained and she always stayed very positive about it. It became her goal to make as much out of the last "two years" that they told her she had left to live. She wanted to get well enough to be able to walk and take the grandkids on one last vacation. Unfortunately that didn't happen as the radiation couldn't slow the growth of the tumour that had her bedridden and her pain just got worse with each day.

Through it all, her husband put all his work and business aside to take care of her. He never left her side.

Last time I saw her living was on Valentines day, not long before the doctors induced a coma to end her pain and let her die in peace. It was very difficult to say goodbye; she was in a healthy state of mind still and wasn’t ready to go. It was a chilling last memory because although she was strong up until that day, that was the day she broke down and couldn’t emotionally handle what was happening anymore... The image of all her little grandchildren piled on her bed, hugging her and crying, and seeing that she clearly hadn’t come to terms with her own death still haunts me today.

She would be 52 today.

Sylvia passed away on the evening of February 24th, 2012. Her memories will never be forgotten.

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Sylvia and Martin were brother and sister. They passed away less than 10 minutes from each other in hospital beds 200 miles apart. (Their mother was at Martin's side as per request by Sylvia).

blackroses.jpg

RIP Sylvia and Martin.

[The_Fly_UK]

It's been hard for you, you know where I'm at x

[nicoal2]

I'm so sorry, DG. I had no idea you were going through this, and so recently, too.

[dad61]

Originally Posted by DragonsGirl

Martin (Uncle Marty) was Sylvia's (mom's) younger brother.

He was sick for a while longer than her and the family expected him to pass away weeks sooner than he had.

A brother and a sister, two different conditions, two different hospitals, two hundred miles apart. They died on the same night, within minutes of each other.

Can you imagine being my ex-husband's grandmother? She's around 75 years old, healthy as a horse herself but had to watch two of her kids die at such a young age.

She said that knowing they were both sick and that it was inevitable they were to pass away, it was sort of comforting to her that the they went together.

I see, no, I can't imagine, no parent should ever have to bury their children, so sad.

That's an amazing story though, brother and sister like that.

I'm sorry for your losses DG, my heartfelt condolence to you.

[Smudgen]

Good thoughts for you DG.

[chickadee2]

Im sorry DG

[kmmouse]

Never forget the good times DG

Sylvia, spirit will live on in you and her family!

[productofsociety]

RIP to both of them. Very sorry, DG.

[the demon]

My respects and condolences Dragon. I feel the same way about my step dad, great guy. Powerful thread. Hope you and your family are well.

Rip. Sylvia & Martin.

[Vladimir]

Sorry for your losses DG. Such a cruel unsettling beautiful universe we have found. May it all be with you, in life and in death. I have faith they have found peace from suffering and worries and something more to them/for them for us/for you DG(more of a universalist universial idealism for you)

RIP